Fishing in School - Teases On The Playground

(Facing The School Yard Bullies)

(Teases and Put-Downs In The School Yard (And In Life))

Children experience them every day - teases and put-downs that often lead to hurt and anger. Instinctively, a child might get upset or counter the taunting, only to discover, that is exactly what the instigator wanted. How can a child react without feeling like a victim? ÒOne way is to see a tease or put-down as the bait on a hook,Ó says elementary school counselor Karen Gedig Burnett. ÒThen, think of things you can do to not take the bait.Ó

Burnett suggests several alternatives:
 
 

• keep doing what your doing and don't react to the bait
• agree with the comment
• change the subject
• try to make a joke out of the situation
• ask the person a question
• stay away from this person
• or assertively tell them you don't like to be talked to that way.

"The hook analogy helps children 'see' what is happening," states Burnett, "and they begin to realize they have choices." Children choose how they react, how much attention and influence they give the other person, and how they feel. "We can't really do anything about the other person," she adds, "but we can change the situation by focusing on our own actions."  Instead of seeing themselves as victims, children can begin to recognize the power they have in the situation. "An empowered attitude," says Burnett, "is instrumental in a person's ability to solve problems throughout life."

Where do people fish - where fish are biting. Help children learn not to become someoneÕs favorite fishing spot.

Karen Gedig Burnett has been an elementary school counselor in Northern California for over twenty years and recently authored a children's book, Simon's Hook: A Story About Teases and Put-downs For more information on how to handle teasing visit www.grandmarose.com.

 

GR Publishing pub@grandmarose.com (831)335-5366

Grandma Rose's Neighborhood 2002